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Part of me never really felt connected. I grew up in a family where no one looked like me. I wanted different things. I had different views. I was never white enough, never black enough. I desperately wanted to fit in, to feel like I belonged. I tried to force fit myself in many boxes over the years. None of them made me feel good. I didn’t know who I was or who I wanted to be. I kept working on who I was supposed to be. Until I met someone who showed me what it looked like to show up as your whole authentic self and create space for others as well. There was an instant connection that sparked something inside of me. As I leaned into this frequency, more people showed up on similar journeys and my tribes began to form. 

As humans, we need connection. There is a reason solitary confinement is considered one of the worst forms of punishment. We are social beings. Social connection is one of our fundamental human needs. However, all connections aren’t good connections. We’ve created a world where it can be hard to show up as our authentic selves. We change who we are, put on masks and false identities just to fit in, belong and connect. We enter into and stay in toxic friendships, relationships, work environments and even family situations so we don’t have to be alone. We let fear keep us from removing the masks, and allowing ourselves to find those we can truly connect with in healthy ways. We don’t take time to explore new experiences that will connect us to new people, find new things to enjoy or find spaces where we can show up our whole selves. 

I’m blessed to have many nourishing connections: a sisterhood that is my support system, a tribe of creatives with whom I can play and explore myself in new and different ways, a spiritual community with whom I continue to grow and evolve. All tribes where I can fully be my authentic self and always feel like I belong and for that I am eternally grateful. 

Is it time to take inventory on who you spend your time with? Are you creating space to make new connections?

Love & Light,


Life Work:

List the top 5 people you spend the most time with. What connects you? Have a conversation about how to support each other in being your true selves. If you feel like you don’t have enough authentic connection in your life, make a commitment to find an interest group and join a conversation. The internet has enabled connection in ways never possible before. Your tribe is out there, find them.